Take off your pants, it's time to jump around
Demand we understand the soul beneath the sound
I came to rock and you're invited to the party
Just don't unlock the liquor cabinet, hands off the Bacardi

I'm not your bodyguard, I'm a celebrity
You seem ridiculous, don't try to step to me
My mind's meticulous and I provide the remedy
You might be sick of this, but there's no telling me

I'm quicker than a six sigma fixing your issues
I'm liquid like mixers distributed in test tubes
My chest moves from the force of my diaphragm
I rescue cats with trees like a fireman

Can't outsmoke me, no one's higher than
The most ridiculous verses that are spiraling
Into the void, steal your pizza like the Noid
Make a feature request for app on Android

You can't avoid me, my flow is omnipresent
Don't make a noise, you'll crash like nine eleven
If I'm annoyed, my words become my weapon
You'll be destroyed like a boy in the Old Testament

… Don't test my patience
I won't hesitate to create a basis
To debate whether fate coincides with destiny
When I change the future, what will the lesson be?

I'm less than three with nerds in ASCII
I surf for perverseness, clever and nasty
I burn down your turf with my Elder Wand
And assert my dominion to quell the throng

I could sell a song to a hungry bard
Cast a spell so long it leaves spirit shards
Ring the bell and the gong when you hear my name
Now it's well past time for the first refrain, it goes

=

I build the system and you're just the user
I craft the logic and you get confused-er
My skills are magic and you're a civilian
I am a googol while you're just a million

=

I am the alpha, omega and delta
I came to play Sega and then rescue Zelda
… I charge up like Mega Man
Unleashing unforeseen pain like a Lego can

…So just leggo my Eggo
My ego you're grepping is big like a preggo
… I'm the greatest of thieves
And the hearts that I've stolen, I wear on my sleeve

.. I'm the rarest of these
Comparatively unembarrassed reprieves
From crooning and three chord progressions for naptime
I'm not John Mayer and this here is rap time

.. I Game Genie your girl
Then we Action Replay until her toes curl
I snag all your data and cache it securely
Call you Sony 'cause you hide it so poorly

Don't send a decoy, I won't be fooled
Like Leonard Nimoy, I keep it cool
Just like a steel toe, I make it get heavy
Then crush my opponents before they get ready

I played cassettes steady, but now it's digital
Some people get petty, but I stay literal
I'd rather get Betty than a Veronica
Rather smoke trees with Phoebe than get down with Monica

… Not the leader you wanted
I laugh in your face when you tell me shit's haunted
… I won't meet your demands
But I'll streamline procedures according to plan

You dreamed of a demon, and now I've arrived
Don't even demean yourself acting surprised
I mean what I say and I settle my debts
I'm an evil dark wizard, don't ever forget that

=

I build the system and you're just the user
I craft the logic and you get confused-er
My skills are magic and you're a civilian
I am a googol while you're just a million